PAID OPPORTUNITY: CLINICAL TRIAL!
Need gil? Want to contribute to breakthroughs in medicine? We will pay gil upfront for participation in our clinical trial! Speak with Koffee Haus or Phoenix Haus today!

Aether Stimulant

Payment10k gil
Risk⭕️⭕️⚫️⚫️⚫️
DescriptionFacilitates aether flow in and out of the body, primarily boosting healing abilities. Takes effect within minutes.
AppearanceThis white powder feels increasingly suspicious, especially when it must be nasally inhaled, but the representative insists it was concocted in their own lab. It hits like expected, sharp and bitter.
QualificationsNo history of anxiety disorders.
InteractionsCharacters with EDHD (Eorzean adhd) may have their attention boosted instead.

Performance Steroids

Payment50k gil
Risk⭕️⭕️⭕️⚫️⚫️
DescriptionAn array of enhancements are available:
-Dexterity: Reduces reaction time by half
-Strength: Lift capacity doubles for twelve hours.
-Endurance: Abundant energy. User feels no need to sleep.
AppearanceGlows in either green, blue, or purple hues. Leaves a glowing dot at point of injection that may map out veins in paler users. The glow fades in several hours as the effects start to kick in.
QualificationsCannot be pregnant or nursing. No history of addiction.
InteractionsFatigue equivalent to the energy used catches up to user after twenty four hours.

Soul Fluxor

Payment200k gil
Risk⭕️⭕️⭕️⭕️⭕️
DescriptionPrimitive in its development and even appearance, this drug attempts to dissolve metaphysical boundaries. Your pysche reaches out to others and can send emotions, short strings of words, and memory flashes. Ascians were harmed in the making of this product.
AppearanceA purple, pungent, grainy salve that is applied to the forehead. It seems to evaporate instantly, but in truth the skin absorbs it on contact. The only visible tell is a soft glow of the iris.
QualificationsNo self-reporting Echo users.
InteractionsRoll twice. End up with no side effects, one, or possibly both! Pure-blooded Garleans experience no side effects. Echo users suffer two effects with twice the intensity.

Medical Effects

  • Feeling lucky? Type the corresponding die for your medicine of choice

  • (Example: Type /random 100 or /random 200 in Say)

  • You can choose to give your character a placebo. It will taste the same but provide no effects.

  • You can also choose a specific side effect you want, but the canonical rarity of your chosen effect will remain the same.

  • (Example: rolling for a d50 drug means you can only pick symtpms between 0-50.)

  • All effects cease within 24 hours

RollEffect
0-10random sneezing fits and headaches
11-20surge of self-confidence and reduced inhibitions
21-30lowered guard. open, trusting, gullible
31-40feeling very warm. wearing clothes feels suffocating
41-50levin-aspected. metal clings to you like magnets
51 -60bloodshot eyes and constant nose bleeds
61-69nice. increased libido and touch sensitivity
71 -80muscle spasms and paralysis in arms or legs
81 -90temporary blindness
91-100paranoia and increased anxiety
RollEffect
100 -110you feel fine but will forget the next 24 hours
111 -120see perfectly in the dark, but sunlight blinds you
121 -130compulsion to speak whatever is on your mind
131 -140silences pain receptors. feel no pain... for now
141 -150auditory and visual hallucinations. good or bad
151 -160mental reversion to a younger version of self
161 -170loss of aether sense and control. lose the Echo
171 -180physical touch burns you and leaves physical scars
181 -190convincing flashbacks to traumatic events
191 -200violent temper and barely restrained bloodlust

Legal Disclaimer

If asked to provide documentation, the representative looks at you with genuine surprise. Eventually they bring out a wrinkled document that reads: "You acknowledge you received relevant information about potential risks, benefits, and interactions. By signing this form you absolve Phoenixian Pharmacy of any legal responsibility regarding your....." The legal jargon drones on and it's unclear if it carries any weight or if it's just for show.

OOC Disclaimer

  • No in-game gil is exchanged. Only IC/roleplay money!

  • These are RP hooks to spark interesting scenarios for your character and others. Please do not verbally or physically threaten my characters, or embroil them in any acts of revenge. Practice etiquette by not forcing side effects and erratic behaviour on fellow roleplayers without consent!

  • Can my character take a certain drug even if they don't qualify? Yes! Phoenix, the head alchemist, secretly counts on people to not follow directions. The data is far more useful than anything she could have acquired legally. However, Kof will use discretion to refuse servicing characters who may seriously endanger themselves.

Muscle Relaxant

Payment5k gil
Risk⭕️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️
DescriptionGradually relaxes the muscle groups and targets chronic pain. Provides moderate relief for athletes with tight muscles or cramps from menstruation. Blood flow and flexibility improves around the joints.
AppearanceA clear, teal syrup. It smells strongly herbal, tastes bittersweet. and has the consistency of honey.
QualificationsNo history of heart disease.
InteractionsIf the character consumes alcohol within an hour of taking the real medication, add a second side effect.